I don’t talk to you much anymore but I feel that I need to get this out, and the best way I can think of is on tumblr :D haha
Well, the last few days you’ve come in probably like 3 times to my store. You make me want to just yell at you to leave me the fuck alone. You make me sick to my stomach thinking of all the times I let you hurt me and all of the times I let myself think that I was wrong for doing what I felt was right. I mainly feel sick because I let you have power over me when you really meant nothing to me after all.
Now, I’m not trying to be bitter or hateful, so sorry if I am coming off that way.
It’s just the fact that I feel so dumb for living a lie for the last years of our relationship. I never stood up for myself or put my foot down and ended it. No, I had to continue on thinking I was happy because I felt that I could not find anyone else “better”.
I learned a lot about myself in the month I was actually single. I know it wasn’t a lot of time to give myself, but that’s honestly all I needed to move on because I had already, in essence, moved on. I was more hurt that I wasn’t the one to end the relationship.
I get this awful feeling even thinking about you, and it really does make me sad because I never thought I could dislike someone so much. This is all that pent up anger, frustration, hurt, and pain I went through just to try to be a good girlfriend, when you didn’t even deserve it.
You have no idea how much you had hurt me in the past. You’ll honestly never understand and that is your loss because I have DEFINITELY moved on.
Now I am with this amazing man, who has made mistakes, but had always tried to fix it with me and has always had my back and just made me feel so at home and so safe.
I am so happy to have this guy and I am just so happy with the way my life is going. I can’t even express in words how excited I am for the future. It makes me happy knowing that I can count on this guy to show me he loves me everyday and that he is here for me even when I do the wrong thing.
I’m just… Happy now.